Yes I’m a horrible mother (winner is announced)
Let me tell you about cereal and why it is the bane of my existence as a mother. I don’t mind my kids eating cereal for breakfast. That’s really the reason why I buy it. So I don’t have to ‘make’ breakfast. All of my children are capable of getting a bowl and a spoon, reaching the cereal and the milk and ‘making’ themselves breakfast. Even my almost three year old. Even if the kids wanted to have cereal as a snack I wouldn’t care. The problem I have is with the waste. They pour themselves a bowl of cereal, then pour in the milk, then they take approximately 2.4 bites, then they remember something dreadfully important to the State of the Union that they must take care of immediately or the planet will be in peril! Things like ‘hey! My sister is TOUCHING MY STUFF!’ Well, of course they must remove the stuff from the offending sister, but said sister wasn’t born yesterday- so she sees her coming and runs, well then the child must give chase to the sister, catch her, pin her down and reclaim her stuff. Then she gets distracted by something shiny and spends 12.9 minutes looking at cool things that she keeps hidden under her bed. About that time I announce we’ll be leaving in 7.2 minutes to take the oldest sister to school and everyone needs to finish eating, take their dishes off the table, get shoes on and get in the car.
WAIT! I didn’t eat yet! So she goes back to the table to eat her cereal- only to discover that the cereal is soggy. GROSS! So she gets another bowl, and another spoon (none of this dirty spoon business here) and pours another bowl of cereal- pushing the other one out of the way and takes approximately 3.7 bites when I say, “it’s time to go. RIGHT NOW! Everyone in the car! Quick like bunnies!” Well, the child that wasn’t moving when I said,”it’s time to go” hears, “quick like bunnies” and drops her spoon and runs for the car. (Okay, slowly stands up from the table and starts to look for her shoes.) After dropping kids off at school (mine and the neighbor kid)- I still have three at home ALL DAY LONG (until July 21st when school is starting) I go to exercise (5 days a week baby!)
By the time we get home the second bowl of cereal is soggy and the first bowl is a congealed mush and “HEY!” the kid thinks, “I didn’t have breakfast!” So the cycle starts again at 10:00. I realize that she’s only had 6.1 bites of cereal but she’s wasted two bowls so far. Usually by the time lunchtime rolls around there are twice as many (or more) bowls of nasty on the table that don’t belong to anyone (if you ask them that’s what they’ll tell you). Honestly it’s not even the cereal and milk wasting that bugs me- it’s the grossness that is bowls of soggy cheerios everywhere (although it has inspired the name of this blog.)
So I’ve instituted a ‘no cereal except for breakfast’ rule. There is no reason for all my girls to have another bowl of cereal when we come home from exercising. I realize that they are hungry but we have OTHER FOOD! I know- shocking. So on Tuesday when we came home from exercising Annika immediately says, ‘I’m hungry- I didn’t have breakfast!’ and starts to get out a bowl. I told her, ‘no cereal, you may have a banana, an apple, an orange, or a cheese stick.’ (We’re all about the healthy options here). I then went and turned on the shower and stripped down (because I like to take showers naked and stuff) when Megan comes in and says, ‘Annika’s getting cereal out for her and Cori!’ So I came out naked (my apologies to my backyard neighbor if you happened to be looking out your kitchen window and into mine) and took the cereal away and put her in her room. I told her she needed to stay there until I got out of the shower since she apparently couldn’t follow directions.
Now I grew up in a family of nine kids. I have SEVEN sisters- I appreciate hot water and can (and usually do) take 5 minute (or less) showers so other people can appreciate that too. This was the case Tuesday morning. By the time I got out Annika had already poured herself another bowl of cereal- her 4th of the morning. We know where this is going now right?
So I put her back in her room (at 10am) and tell her that she’s welcome to come out after she’s cleaned it up. But it was too hard (those ten pieces of paper, two pairs of pj’s and the couple stuffed animals). She took a nap then wanted to come out for lunch, I restated the conditions of her release from captivity, it was still too hard. I did let her out to use the facilities, and she snuck out a couple of times and got sent back- but nothing was motivating enough to do the job until her sisters were going down the street to play in the sprinklers. Then it took her 3 minutes to clean it up at 6:29 so that she could go too.
The time it took Annika to clean her room? 8 hours and 29 minutes. Maria is the winner! Apparently she wants cookies. I can do that!
PS. Yesterday she destroyed Ashley’s room. I told her she was responsible for cleaning it up (not like it was pristine to begin with). I set the timer for 5 minutes and told her at the end of five minutes I’d be taking her giraffe if she wasn’t done. She wasn’t so I took it. Then I told her I was resetting it for another 5 minutes at the end of which I’d be taking her Carebear if she wasn’t done. She wasn’t so I took it. I reset it for another 5 minutes and told her that I’d be taking her Winnie the Pooh pillow next. She finished in less then 15 minutes a room that was MUCH messier then the first one. Then she proceeded to clear and wipe the table, pick up up toys in the living area, make her bed and clean the hall to earn back her things. She CAN do it when she wants too- it’s just getting her to want to that’s the trick.
Do you believe follow through (doing what you say) is as important as I do?
What’s the longest you’ve made your kids stay in their rooms?
The cereal thing- does that happen at your house too?
I got grounded for a year once- I’ll have to tell you that story sometime.
Filed under: I'm a mom, annika, food, steller parenting moments
Ha! Ha! Good job, Mom.
I forgot to vote. We just went thru this with my 4 yr old. I could have tidied it in 5 minutes, I figured she could do it in 15, even if she stopped to play.
Her messy room took her 9 hours (which was going to be my vote). Right after breakfast, she missed snack and lunch. She slept for most of it, used the bathroom a LOT, sneaked out a few times, and screamed for the rest.
When dad came home he set her timer for 10 minutes and told her that whatever was left out was his. She didn’t even stop to play but put things away fast. When her timer beeped he grabbed the garbage back and took the few things that were still out, as she tried to put them away before he got them. She was just in time for her afternoon snack.
Each night that she was good, she was able to choose one item back from the bag. She has all of her toys back and her room has been tidy for over 2 months!! She now puts everything away before she goes to bed, “so Papa can’t take my things!”
The cereal thing doesn’t happen here. She eats hers dry. When breakfast time is over whatever is not done goes in a baggie for a snack later or breakfast tomorrow.
I’m a HUGE believer in follow through. It drives me crazy to be around other kids who have parents who don’t! I believe that when other kids are over at my house, they have to abide by my rules as well. Make a mess? You clean it up. Hungry? Gotta eat something nutritious first, and you must finished what you asked for before I’ll give you something different. Go to the potty? Flush and wash your hands. Want something that someone else has? Negotiate a way to take turns. Playing with a precious item of my children? Show respect for it and don’t break it, please. There are a couple of kids who won’t come over to my house because I do enforce those rules. Too bad for them, I say.
My kids have stayed in their rooms for a couple hours at a time. Ethan’s a good kid and rarely needs punishing. Rachel tends to go in there and fall asleep.
Rachel is my “cereal killer”. I hate it when she asks for Life, Chex or Golden Grahams, because I know she won’t finish it and those ones turn particularly nasty.
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Do you believe follow through (doing what you say) is as important as I do?
Yes I do. I think that is the main problem with parents any more is that they dont follow through on what they say they are going to do.
What’s the longest you’ve made your kids stay in their rooms?
I dont know off the top of my head, but hours is the timeframe, not minutes.
The cereal thing- does that happen at your house too? Kinda, but I wont give them milk with their cereal anymore for that reason. all cereal consumed at our house is dry.
Becky’s last blog post..Sometimes you just need a little crazy
The DI bag is my favorite tool. And I am happy to actually deliver my collection (and get my tax deduction).
We make announcements that the meal is ending soon and remaing dishes will be cleared away. It seems to help.
YEAH!!!!!!!!!!! That’s so cool I won! I’m really sorry about your battle… but you, the parent, did WIN! That is very important too. We are very good at follow though here. No empty threats at our house and I can see big differences in families that have a harder time with that. It’s not easy and it definitely takes two some days to stick with it.
I’ve not actually left her in her room for too long, though she’s been sent there plenty. We have a few other strategies we employ at times. I was laughing at the first comment when the dad took everything away that was out… I’ve done that too several times and it has a good shock value, Haven’t had too much problem lately with cleaning up, and it’s a good threat to use b/c we’ve done it before.
My daughter eats everything, even her cereal, so no soggy cheerios here
BTW, I want some of those lemon, white chocolate cookies I’ve heard so much about. No rush, but my birthday is coming up soon
Gotta follow through. Threats aren’t threats if the kids know you’re not *really* going to act. On the other side, promises need to be promises. If I promise a reward for good behavior, I make darn sure they get it. I feel like I’m so harsh on them some days…so the few times they actually earn a reward, it’s a big deal.
And we got some soggy cheerios here. YUCK! But even hours later, my son will still eat it! Double YUCK! He usually finishes his cereal just in time for lunch.
Jessica G.’s last blog post..A Letter To Me
I Am a HUGE believer in doing what you say you will do. Sometimes I have to eat my words though. One night I told my son that if he refused to get his pj’s on he would have to sleep in his clothes. He said he wanted to sleep in his clothes…so I had to let him. Not a huge deal…but he had a harder time getting to sleep since he didn’t feel “ready” for bed. Now I try not to give him options that hurt me more than him!
I don’t tend to send Matthew to his room because it holds all of his toys. When he needs a time out he gets to sit on the naughty chair in the corner. He hates that chair! It leads to many pre-time out apologies.
I do get the soggy cheerios thing…but Matthew is limited to one bowl a day. If he doesn’t eat it in time he can wait for lunch. It only took once. He DOWNS his cereal now!
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Hi,
I am a newbie here, but I like what I have read so far so I thought I would put my two cents in.
Good for you for the follow through! I love to hear other moms who actually do this. My husband and I are getting better at the follow through. My daughter was always pretty good and then she turned 3. She will be 4 next Wednesday and she is just finally getting that we mean what we say. It is harder when we aren’t at home, though. But a couple of weeks ago she was being naughty at the zoo and we said we were going home. I don’t think she really believed us until we were in the parking lot. We also left her dance class early because she wasn’t listening to the teacher. The next week she was much better. Oh my gosh, it works! The only problem we have now is that her cousins don’t get the same discipline. I think sometimes she gets confused because she gets in trouble for doing some of the same things they do but they don’t. We just try to make it consistent.
I have never sent her to her room to clean it, but she does have time-outs in there.
We also don’t have the cereal problem because if she leaves it, it gets thrown away and she has to wait until snack time for other food. But this is mainly on the weekend because she goes to daycare during the week.
I think age 3 is harder than we’re led to believe. Everyone talks about the “terrible twos” but in my experience and many others I’ve spoken to, three is very difficult! It has gotten quite a bit easier (we turned 5 two months ago) since, but the consistency and follow through is key!
Yes I believe in follow through!
I also believe in making sure that I don’t threaten to do something that I can’t follow through on, because I have one who will always test me.
The cereal thing happens at our house. My 12 year old is the worst, but he doesn’t like milk on his cereal, so he will eat it later. However, he IS a 12 yo boy and will eat pretty much anything. The other kids use milk, and I get tired of throwing away the cereal sludge.
We’ve never really kept the kids in their rooms. Our punishments are different. Like last week, when one of our kids refused to do his homework, I took the other two (who had finished their homework) out to get ice cream, and they brought it home and ate it in front of him.
Tears were shed.
When he finally got the homework done, he demanded that I take him out to get ice cream, but alas, it was after 9:00 and the ice cream place was closed.
I like to think of it as natural consequences;0)
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What size bowl does the cereal go in? I know, a wierd random question. Maybe you should get really small bowls for cereal bowls. Kind of stealing this from Hope, but she has “Cereal” bowls that are very small or actual serving size. (About a 1/2-1 cup Serviing) Something like, cereal can only be eaten in these bowls, and once they’re gone, no more cereal for that day. Or this is your one serving of cereal for today. If it goes soggy, no more… or something.
One of my friends has identical triplet boys and no follow through! Drives me crazy!!!